The Duchess Who Wouldn't Sit Down
Jesse Browner’s Informal History of Hospitality
The Duchess Who Wouldn’t Sit Down is author Jesse Browner’s third book. His previous two books were novels, however, his third book is a historical exploration of hospitality.
A Promising Introduction
Jesse Browner opens the book with an amusing description of his use of hospitality on poker night against five of his old friends. He describes how he uses good food to disarm his friends and bluff them out of their money. Browner is wise to start off with a description that makes the reader smile. Many of the stories in the book are funny, strange, and even disgusting; they draw the reader in and compel them to continue reading until the end of the book.
While Browner often entertains the reader or gives them something to contemplate, he also has the tendency to indulge in repellent bouts of cynicism. Consider his beautiful and philosophical thoughts on dining with others: “Eating, and hospitality in general, is a communion, and any meal worth attending by yourself is improved by the multiples of those with whom it is shared” (5).
Yet in less than two pages, he irreverently comments that “It is here that we are confronted with the unspeakable truth...we communicate with others in the language of mutual benefits. It is here that the auditors shield themselves from their own concupiscence...self-interest is the chariot of salvation” (7)
An Overview of Hospitality’s History
Despite his tendency to focus on the negative, Browner provides us a feast of historical tidbits and facts that range from the amusing to the bizarre. He takes us back through time and explores how hospitality has shaped history and civilization; from Nero to Hitler and from the Dark Ages to 9/11 we are provided with peeks into both great feasts and personal pain.
Most of Browner’s examples of historical hospitality focus on the abuses of hospitality. He gives example after example of sumptuous banquets and talented hosts who use the gift of hospitality to take advantage of their friends and rivals. Other examples focus on the guests who exploitat the privilege of hospitality, by abusing or demeaning their hosts.
Very few examples are positive examples of both host and guest enjoying the benefits of hospitality to their purest and fullest extent. Perhaps Browner’s most enjoyable anecdote is his retelling of one of the few gentle Greek myths, the story of Baucis and Philemon. As Browning himself writes, “the entire story, despite the destruction is suffused with a most gentle and transcendent love that transmutes all it touches” (173).
A Beautiful Conclusion
The last chapter of the book his Browner’s most personal and most poignant description of hospitality. He shares with us his Thanksgiving meal in 2001 and the memories of past Thanksgivings, which were perhaps, even more painful. And then he ends, with a long and beautiful paragraph comparing perfect hospitality with heaven.
A Worthwhile Book
While Browner’s attitude is sometimes frustrating and even off-putting, his book is worth reading. The wealth of information and the occasional lyrical passages about true hospitality offset the negative aspects of this book. The Duchess Who Wouldn’t Sit Down is a book for anyone who entertains guests or enjoys being entertained.
Browner, Jesse. The Duchess Who Wouldn’t Sit Down: An Informal History of Hospitality. Bloomsbury, 2003.
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